Legal landscape note: This article was originally published in 2019 and describes the law as it stood at that time. New Jersey law changes frequently.
School lets out in June, and suddenly the parenting schedule that worked all year does not fit anymore. Camp weeks, family vacations, and two working parents' calendars all collide at once -- and if you are divorced, every one of those decisions runs through a visitation schedule and, often, a court order. How much that schedule can flex depends on your child's age and what your orders actually say.
The number one priority when dealing with divorce and summer break should always be the welfare of the child(ren). Younger children are more vulnerable and impressionable so their visitation should be tailored to fit the needs of their age. It is important when making the summer schedule to try and keep the time between both parents as equal as possible.
Summer camps can also be problematic as when the child is at camp, the parent is not really getting their time with the child. Often, summer camps can be over night or away camp. All these issues can be worked out for the best interest of the child.
For out of state parents, scheduling can be more difficult. Distance is an issue and it is best for the child if an agreement can be made to split time to reduce travel time for the child.
Equal parenting time is key for children of a younger age and this can be especially difficult to maintain for divorced parents who both work full-time. It is essential to plan and request vacation time in advance. Older children may want to be more independent in the summer and start making their own plans with their friends so co-parents will need to be flexible as this can throw a wrench into the scheduled time on paper. Make sure to communicate with the child and co-parent to try and find something that works for everyone.
While working through the summer plan, take care not to put the child in the middle. Give older children room to say how they want to spend their summer, and factor that into the schedule.
The children will know when a parent is keeping them from another parent. This can hurt your relationship with the child as they get older. Do the right thing for your child's sake.
An Illustrative Decision Point
Consider a hypothetical order that gives each parent two vacation weeks but does not say whose request controls when the same camp week is chosen. One parent has paid a deposit, while the other has already arranged travel. The useful question is not which plan sounds more enjoyable. It is what the order requires, what notice was given, and which proposal serves the child's needs with the least disruption.
Bring the current order, the complete summer calendar, camp and travel dates, notice provisions, payment deadlines, and the parents' written communications. Counsel can then identify what is already governed by the order, what can be resolved by agreement, and whether clarification, enforcement, or modification should be considered. This hypothetical does not predict which schedule a court would approve.